I guess self development, (self improvement, personal growth ... whatever name you give it) has been around since the beginning of humankind's appearance on Earth. Cave dwellers would have worked out how to hunt and fish in better and better ways, and we had the development of tools.
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Being human, then as now, they would have started to wonder how they got here, who they were and why they died. (And what happens after that?) Those questions haven't changed, but the search for the answers has shaped the entire course of history as it continues to shape our future.
Societies have inevitably produced teachers. These may have taken the form of priests, gurus, shamans, wise wizards or just your good mates, but there's always been the odd bods who seem to have a bit more knowledge about the inner workings of the universe, (some even claim to have a pretty good idea what God's thinking too). Of course, those teachers would have had nothing to do were it not for a never ending supply of willing students.
I've been on both sides of that particular fence. I've read literally hundreds of self help books, attended countless seminars and workshops, had thousands of group hugs, ended up with dozens of mailing lists of people you never hear from or contact again and along the way have gleaned an almost encyclopaedic knowledge of how to run my life to perfection, be a millionaire, live in harmony with nature and generally be a super human being.
I've led workshops too. I've had audiences of less than half a dozen to many hundreds. I've written more than a handful of self help books and programs too, and many articles on topics related to self help and self improvement.
The results are always the same. The vast majority of people don't change. In fact, not only do they not change, they don't even try. It is well known amongst self help authors that most people (around 90 percent) don't read beyond chapter one!! (A survey done by a prominent manufacturer of recorded language courses found a similar statistic: ninety percent of their customers never listened to more than the first disc! Many even never got further than disc 1, track 1).
Why is this? Are ninety percent of people stupid?
No. I really don't believe that, and it's not my experience.
Maybe they're just addicted to personal growth material - they like the reading and the group experiences.
Hmm. Maybe. But not ninety percent. Most people I've met who move in these circles, (and I've met thousands), genuinely want to improve their lives in some way. They want more from life. Not simply more money or things or even love, (although all of those will be high on most people's wish lists), but they want more satisfaction from life, more fulfilment, more juice. They want peace of mind and personal freedom.
So why don't they get it?
It's because of something I've called "Core Image". If you were told from a tender age, (and I do mean from two or three years old), that you were clumsy, or you never got anything finished, or that you were untidy, you began to integrate that into yourself as part of your identity. Not, as you might now, consider it a characteristic, or even a misjudgement on the part of the person expressing that view of you, but actually who YOU are.
Up until the age of about six or seven you are trying to figure that out - the question of what and who exactly you are. Certain messages will get absorbed and become part of the fabric of your being as surely as an ink stain will become a part of a linen tablecloth forever more.
Does this indelibility mean that you cannot change?
Fortunately, I think the answer to that is no. You CAN change. But you aren't going to do it with most self help courses and books unless you go deep. The answer lies not in trying to remove the stain, but to replace the entire linen tablecloth!
In principle, here is what you do. (I like to put solutions in my work, but be warned: this is a brief article and I cannot take you through the entire process here. If you want to know about the whole thing, please visit my website, wizardofwisdom.com - details at the end).
Step 1. Relax - but don't go to sleep. Take a few minutes over this, not ten seconds! If you know how to meditate or do yoga, use those skills to fully relax.
Step 2. Ask your mind to show you moments from your childhood when you were told something good about yourself. (I recalled my personal development courses mother smiling and saying how intelligent I was, for example. I was probably four years old).
Step 3. Notice where that memory seems to be located. In other words, does it seem to be in front of you, left, right, behind, above, below your eye line etc. Is it in colour or black and white? How loud is the volume of the speaker's voice? (It may not be your mother, of course!)
Step 4. Fade out the sound, and fade in words you want to hear, such as, "You're very successful whatever you do." "You always get the things you want." "You have a winning personality, and everyone likes you." "You're so lovely, opportunities are just going to show up in your life." "You'll always be lucky."
You can make up your own, of course. I'm going to emphasise a couple of really important points here. The voice you hear must have the same tone and qualities of the original voice.
Secondly, feel the feeling of pride or joy as you did when you actually were the little child as those words go in. You are re-programming your core image, so this is vitally important!
Do this process for about twenty minutes a day - make sure the phone and other disturbing elements are taken care of - and do it for twenty one days. (I don't know why that magic number seems to work, but by then your brain just believes it as surely as it believes you're a man or a woman now).
Now, here's my problem. I know this process works. It could hardly take less effort since it involves being totally relaxed and closing your eyes - it's very pleasant to do, and the effects are life changing! But ... I can't make you believe it. And I certainly can't make you try it.
And I wonder if you read past paragraph one!
Personal Development and Why You Need It.
Why?
Why do you need personal development you ask; well the answer is rather simple. If you do not develop continually you are going backwards by going nowhere at all. Life will continue to evolve shift, expand and contract and if you stop being able to develop new skills and talents; then you will get left in the dust. You have so many undiscovered talents and skills in you it is almost funny but the sad truth is many people take their gifts and talents to the grave with them. Many people never afford the world the opportunity to experience the uniqueness of their character that only they can offer. So do not cheat the world of your presence and ideas make personal development a weekly task and find out what you are truly capable of.
Personal Development
Personal development is the key to becoming the best you that you can be. No one on earth is at a point in life where all of the skills and talents they have are all firing on the same cylinder. We all have room to grow and mature no one is beyond personal development. The human species is one of the most complex and marvelous creatures aside from our seemingly insatiable appetite for war and violence of course, we are pretty creative as well as resilient. However, we all need to continually train our minds and bodies to be better. When you stop seeking some form of development you will plateau out and will eventually succumb to complacency and procrastination. Arriving at a level of extreme complacency will lead to being unfulfilled and eventually psychologically and possibly social digression. You must keep moving or else your passion for life will die and take you with it. A passionate pursuit for personal development is the only way to avoid this tragedy.
Remember that personal development consists of not only being conscience of your physical health but your mental health as well. Pursuing mental and physical wholeness requires that one word that the lazy shun like the plague and the dedicated hold dear "commitment". While serving in the Marine Corps the word commitment was engraved into our mines religiously. This brutal yet effective method of indoctrination caused me to develop good internal habits that I still carry with me to this day. While pursuing various aspects of personal development; you must accept that training yourself to be a student of personal development comes at a price.
Skill Development
Everyone has a certain set of skills they have acquired over many years of working however, like anything you have learned how to do; those skills can continually be fine-tuned. I was reading a book a while back called the millionaire mind and it discussed how successful people do not simply rely on innate talent but they lean heavily on their ability to sharpen those talents and skills to remain successful. Being a good business owner is one thing but being a great one requires effort and discipline. Furthermore, developing your skill sets will not only make you a better asset to your occupational field but it will also add a since of fulfillment knowing that you are making a deliberate attempt to become the best you possible.
Personal Development and Success
You will be hard pressed to find one individual that is classified as successful that has not made learning and development a vital part of their lives. Let me add that being able to go to a great learning institution and attain a degree is a very fundamental aspect of personal development. Personal improvement requires you to dive into your psychological patterns, your habits, relational issues, spending practices and a plethora of other things looking for the perfect balance in each. If you have time, check out a book called "THE COMPLETE 101 COLLECTION "by John C. Maxwell it's a great tool. It expounds on the multiple aspects of personal development and how it directly correlates with a leader's effectiveness. I use it daily and will actually be putting together a life overhaul program based on some of his key discoveries and viewpoints on leadership and development.
Being the best you can be requires you to train yourself to push beyond excuses and setbacks and find the fortitude to become the excellent version of yourself you may have been longing to become. So stop running from personal development you may be.. no let me rephrase that you are indeed running from your destiny to be great.